Monday, November 3, 2008

The Brighter Side of the Browns

The scary thing about yesterday's second half meltdown against the Ravens is that it felt a bit too normal. Doesn't losing that game just seem natural at this point? I mean, what'd you expect, a defensive stand? A comeback?

But I don't won't to dwell on the negative. Saying nasty stuff about the 2008 Cleveland Browns is too easy. So instead of ripping into D.A., Romeo, and the rest of the gang, let's take a look at some of the things that have actually gone Cleveland's way this season:

--The Browns' travel coordinators have been absolutely stellar. The team has successfully arrived, on time, to every single road game this season. 4 for 4 and counting -- you can't argue with those numbers!

--For the most part, every offensive player has been running towards the correct endzone on each play.

--The Browns have experienced exactly zero on-field decapitations this season.

--Brady Quinn has yet to physically or verbally assault a gay person in public.

--No one can criticize the 08' Browns for are their duds. Each week fans have come to expect stain free uniforms showcasing clean and vibrant colors. Whomever is in charge of the team's laundry department deserves a plaque for their hard work this season.

--Derek Anderson's hand off success rate is well over 90%.

--Cleveland Browns Stadium has had no major alien attacks/invasions during home games this year. In fact, there has been zero reports of any roving alien space crafts within 10 miles of the field at any point this season.

--As of this week Braylon Edwards' hands are still able to open car doors, operate ATM's, grip silverware, and press 4 out of the 5 buttons on "Guitar Hero."